Grief As A Form Of Healing
Updated: Apr 22, 2022
Grief is one of the most powerful forms of healing that we have available to us in this moment.
In the Dagara tradition, grief is associated with the element of Water. This indigenous tribe in West Africa teaches us that Water carries the healing frequencies of peace, healing, cleansing, reconciliation and purification.
Water also teaches us to surrender and let go of resistance. When we grieve, we allow ourselves to come to terms with what is, which allows us to better "go with the flow" of life.
Water is non-yielding in that there is nothing that can stop it from reaching its destination. In the same way, grief is non-yielding. Because eventually, you must accept and tend to your losses, heartaches and burdens. Although this form of acceptance is inevitable, we've often been taught to postpone and prolong real grief.
However, you cannot stop tears. You must not suppress pain. And, no matter how deep you try to burry your grief, it will always permeate unless you properly heal it.
If there's one thing that 2020 taught us, it's taught us how powerful grief can be. Grief is the one thing that has united humanity and the one thing that we all have in common. Each of us, in our own way, have had to grieve new endings in our lives. We've had to grieve the old way of living and being in this world. We've had to grieve outdated structures and systems collapsing. Many have had to grieve the loss of loved ones, the loss of jobs, the loss of education, the loss of income, and the loss of trips, experiences and opportunities. Many of us have chosen to move or relocate, changed career paths, or adjusted our beliefs and priorities.
Furthermore, this year has asked us each to shift into a higher state of consciousness, by embracing elevated states of unconditional love, non-judgement, and compassion. Personally, this year gave me an ultimatum where I had to choose the path of love or the path of fear, but could no longer be allowed to tightrope the two of them anymore. This year showed us how powerful fear is and gave us many opportunities to rise out of fear and choose a higher outcome.
It can be said that the very foundation in which we've each created our life upon has begun to crumble underneath of us. We are clearly in the threshold of a planetary initiation, and whether we've embraced this fact or not: there is no turning back. Things are shifting and life as we know it will never, ever be the same.
What this brings for us, both as an individual and as a collective humanity, is the opportunity to for us to heal. It brings for us a new opportunity to shed light on all that was, all that we once were, and all that we no longer are anymore.
As uncomfortable as it is, we can't skip this step. We each have to understand that we've changed course.
A lot of people think that grief is something that you do when someone in your life crosses over. Most don't realize that there's a grieving process that must naturally occur with any life moment or experience that is asking us to change. It is the very act of grieving that allows us to properly let go of and say goodbye to that which we lost. We must come to terms with that part of our life that we are transitioning out of before we can fully step into something new.
My advice today for those who are feeling overwhelmed, heavy, sad, heartbroken, angry, lost, or confused is to sit and contemplate what it is that you are transitioning out of. If you're feeling any kind of pain or suffering, it would be good to allow yourself to properly say goodbye to all that is shifting.
Take stock in all that it is that you've lost this year and in all the years of your life. Essentially, what I'm asking you to do is to count your trials and tribulations. Take inventory of all that has changed and shifted within you and outside of you, especially within the last nine months.
If you do this, you may find that you have a very, very big list.
We've each felt the effects of this massive transition that humanity is entering into. We must remember that, none of us are alone in our grief. We're all enduring the loss of something, someone or the older version of who we once were.
In order for us to fully step into and embrace the next chapter in our own personal life and the collective future of humanity, we must first say goodbye to the old. We can't step into this next phase of our life clinging and attaching to all that was.
Therefore, we have to properly grieve. We have to properly let go of all that is no longer needed in the next chapters of our life.
If you need to cry, cry. Give yourself permission to crack. The more that we cry, the more we are able to connect to the element of Water and allow our tears to heal and transform the parts of us that feel broken.
We can offer our tears as a way to cleanse ourselves and the Earth from all of the pain that we've carried not just in this lifetime, but for centuries. We don't only carry our own personal pain, but we also carry the unprocessed grief of our Ancestors.
Take note of what you are still carrying that is no longer needed and necessary. These can be internal belief systems, behavior patterns, destructive habits, and outdated ways of thinking.
Your losses can also be external things. Such as a job that no longer fits or a relationship that is falling out of your highest alignment. Perhaps the place that you live is no longer working or your daily routines are no longer serving you.
We must examine all of these things that are wanting to be shed from our lifestream. In this way, we see ourselves like a snake with many layers of skin. We must ask ourselves which of these layers are no longer needed.
This is exactly what grieving will do. It will help us to shed the layers of our being that we've been clinging to for so long. It will allow us to let go of these layers that are no longer necessary.
Remember, once a snake sheds it skin, it no longer looks back. Once it's discarded, it's done.
As far as grieving is concerned, we're being asked to shed these old layers without looking back. We can't move on by clinging to the old parts of ourselves.
We must first acknowledge what it is in our life that we are shedding or have already shed. Then we must accept and come to terms with the fact that it's gone. We must make peace with all that is shifting and changing. We must make peace with the transition that has occurred and will continue to occur throughout our life.